Reality Check at Seigaku
by Yithril
Summary: The Seigaku regulars are up against an opponent fiercer than any they've ever encountered....the natural laws of motion! Please R&R.
1. Trouble at Seigaku

Disclaimer : Prince of Tennis (Tenisu no Oojisama) and the characters therein, are creations of Takeshi Konomi, so don't sue me. As always, don't plagiarize ;) Leave reviews if so inclined, I don't have experience writing fanfics and I'd love feedback, be it positive or negative. If you have not yet seen Prince of Tennis than this fan fic will not make a lot of sense, as I make constant specific references to the anime. Btw, just for everyone's FYI, I play the main character of this fic!  
  
Cultural note, Japanese middle school is from U.S. grades 7-9 and high school from 10-12.  
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I found myself sitting before my PC, happily typing another fan fiction story one stormy night. The TV had broadcasted a severe thunderstorm warning in my area. Not wanting to have my fan fiction writing disturbed, I flipped off the TV using my remote and went back to writing. As usual, whenever writing a fan fiction I like to peruse through episodes of the anime I'm writing about on my computer. This evening it would be Tenisu no Oojisama, the tale of Ryoma Echizen and his Seigaku buddies. I laughed hysterically at the moronic cheering of Tomo and her accomplice, Sakuno, as they jumped around in skimpy cheerleader outfits with ridiculous looking pom poms. A gigantic flash of lightning pierced the sky, as the torrential rain beat down at my window pane.  
  
"Man it is really coming down," I said to myself.  
  
Turning back to the anime, I began to write a few more lines of the story, basking in my own literary brilliance. I could hear the sounds of Prince of Tennis going on in the background. Another bolt of lightning crackled throughout the sky. My lights flickered on and off as well as my computer monitor.  
  
"Ahh man, I'd better save and turn this thing off. I was on a roll," I said to myself.  
  
Just then, my monitor began to glow an eerie blue color. Thoroughly confused, I rolled backwards in my chair, distancing myself away from the screen. Strange waves of energy began to emanate from my screen, drawing me in. A Prince of Tennis episode appeared on the monitor, with alternating scenes from the anime showing various characters. Trying to escape, I tried to grab something to bolt myself down, but to no avail. The strange rays of the computer monitor had taken over, sucking me in through the screen. I tumbled through a strange vortex of energy. Swirling waves of dark blue and purple energy washed over my body. My vision went white for a moment, as my consciousness seemed to leave my body.  
  
Moments later I opened my eyes, thoroughly surprised at what I saw.  
  
"What the hell?"  
  
I noticed that the world was now brightly colored and looked like a cartoon. Strangely, my clothes had changed into a pair of dark shorts and a striped red and white t-shirt. I was holding a black tennis racket. Dazed and confused, I scratched my head trying to think about what had happened.  
  
"My hair...it's so...spiky?"  
  
A loud bell chimed, and I saw a throng of Japanese kids in school clothes leaving a large building. I ran out to the front gate and looked at the sign. My years of Japanese language study sure came in handy, as I was able to read the sign.  
  
"Seishungakuen? I'm at Seigaku? That's utterly impossible!"  
  
But the sign wasn't a fake. I gazed up at the high clock tower of the school, surrounded by Japanese kids leaving school or heading to an after school club.  
  
"Well this is a predicament. By some freak accident I've been transported to the world of Prince of Tennis. That's just great..."  
  
While wandering around dazed and confused, I passed three young boys. The one in the middle was wearing a distasteful bright green shirt with two orange and white stripes on the side. The other two were wearing white shirts and maroon shorts. The one with the ugly shirt stopped and looked in my direction.  
  
"Gaijin? Here? Maybe he's an exchange student. Let's go introduce ourselves guys."  
  
The boy in the green shirt tapped my shoulder. Turning around, I recognized it was Horio and his two accomplices, Katsuno and Kachiro.  
  
"Hey, are you an exchange student? I haven't seen you around here before? What's your name?" asked Horio in his usual loud and boisterous manner.  
  
"Umm, I'm standing two feet in front of you and I understand Japanese. There's no need to shout," I said.  
  
"I'm not shouting," replied Horio.  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Well what are you doing here at Seigaku?" asked Kachiro.  
  
I wanted to tell them I was a person from the real world transported by some freak circumstance to their world, but I didn't think they'd buy my explanation. Searching for an answer, I scratched the back of my head.  
  
"Oh, he's here to play tennis!" said Horio triumphantly, while pointing to the tennis racket in my hand.  
  
Looking at the tennis racket in my hand, I simply nodded, hanging on to whatever alibi I could.  
  
"Well we're members of the tennis club, maybe you can come to your practice and see our senpai's in action", said Kachiro, leading me by the arm.  
  
"Umm, yeah sure, I'd be honored," I said.  
  
Horio and the others led me to the back of the school where the tennis courts were. The courts were filled with members of the tennis club. None regulars wore blue-green jackets, while the regulars were clad in white and blue polo shirts and shorts. I could see the regulars holding practice matches. The atmosphere was quite exciting.  
  
"Our senpai's are at the national level again this year. We're preparing to go up against Rikkadai. They're really tough opponents. They train at high tech facilities, and use the latest machines to train themselves," said Horio in his usual loud and brash member.  
  
"Sasuga two years of tennis experience," said Kachiro.  
  
"Umm, I hope you learned more than just that with 'two years of tennis experience'..." I said.  
  
"What did you say?" said Horio fuming.  
  
"Oh nothing, nevermind. I'd like to meet the regulars, maybe we could hold a little practice match." I grinned, the thought of playing with the regulars in this world seemed enticing, and besides, I had no clue how to get back home.  
  
"I don't know, they're awfully busy with practice, but we'll see," said Katsuno.  
  
Katsuno immediately walked over to Oishi who was discussing something with Inui. Oishi's face was genial and kind. His haircut was rather strange, as his hair was cut except for two longer strands in the front. Inui, who stood a few inches taller than Oishi, had very spiky black hair and thick black rimmed glasses. Oishi looked over in my direction and smiled.  
  
"Everyone, gather around!" exclaimed Oishi.  
  
Everyone stopped their respective games and gathered en masse in the front court. Oishi walked up to me and held out a hand. I shook his hand, smiling. Surprisingly, Oishi only stood a few inches shorter than me.  
  
"So you wanted to hold a practice match with our regulars?" said Oishi smiling congenially.  
  
"Yeah, I'd like to see how tough you guys are," I said.  
  
"Well, alright, it'll be a good exhibition. I hope you're strong enough though, our regulars are pretty tough."  
  
"Wait a moment, what grade are you in again?"  
  
"Oh, I'm a third year student."  
  
"In middle school?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Meaning you're 14 years old?"  
  
"Why yes, why do you ask?"  
  
"I'm twenty years old, how could you _possibly_ be my height? Did you overdose on growth hormones or what?"  
  
Clearly confused, Oishi tried to reply but couldn't find an answer. Miraculously, he and the rest of the Seigaku regulars began to shrink slowly, their facial features becoming markedly less defined.  
  
"What...what's happening?!" said the red haired Kikumaru, his voice higher than normal.  
  
I was taken aback by what had happened. I realized that being from the real world I carried over the rules of the real world with me.  
  
"Things could get interesting," I thought to myself.  
  
"So, who'll be your opponent?" asked Oishi, gesturing towards the line of Seigaku regulars. There was Kikumaru, the red haired acrobatic player. Standing next to him was the fearsome Kaidoh, nicknamed the viper due to the resemblance. Next to Kaidoh stood Kawamura, a brown haired boy with well developed muscles. On the very end stood Momoshiro and the always smiling Fuji. Each of the regulars was clearly shaken at their miraculous shrinking.  
  
"Hmm, why don't I go up against Momoshiro? That'll be a good warmup."  
  
"Warmup? WARMUP?!" yelled the now shorter and younger looking version of Momoshiro. Waving his tennis racket about frantically, Momoshiro entered the court.  
  
"I'll make you eat your words. No one refers to Momoshiro Takeshi as a warmup!" Gripping a ball Momoshiro tossed it into the air and hit the ball.  
  
"Deta, Momo-chan-senpai's bullet serve!" yelled the freshman trio.  
  
I leaned in to take the shot, finding the serve of a thirteen year old relatively easy to return.  
  
"You three do realize it's totally ridiculous to call him Momo-chan-senpai, don't you? I mean can't you just pick one like normal people?"  
  
Horio, Kachiro, and Katsuno, simply twiddled their fingers, thoroughly embarrassed.  
  
Momoshiro ran across the court and returned the ball. Wanting to test something out, I lobbed the ball upwards.  
  
"Just what I've been waiting for!" yelled out Momoshiro. Leaping ridiculously high into the air, Momoshiro intended to deliver his specialty, the dunk smash. What troubled me, however, was the inordinate amount of hang time Momoshiro took to reach the ball.  
  
"Umm, unless your leg muscles are the size of a _buick_ you can't leap twenty feet into the air without running, I'm sorry. And secondly, you really can't just float in the air for five minutes at a time." I said, gazing upward at Momoshiro.  
  
Momoshiro's expression turned to complete surprise as his jump was halted in midair, falling to the ground in a crumpled heap.  
  
"0-15."  
  
The Seigaku regulars, as well as the rest of the tennis club, were in total awe.  
  
"Momoshiro's Dunk Smash ... had no effect. What strange, masterful technique is this gaijin using to stop Momoshiro from jumping his usual height?" said Inui, his voice trembling.  
  
"Umm, gravity," I said in reply to Inui.  
  
Momoshiro, now on the ground clutching his leg, could no longer continue the match and was carried off on a stretcher to the school nurse.  
  
"Well, who's next? How about Kawamura?" I said, tapping my racket against my right shoulder and grinning.  
  
"Uhh...who...me?" said Kawamura, pointed to himself and looking downward.  
  
"Taka-san, your racket," said Oishi, tossing Kawamura his racket.  
  
Gripping the racket, Kawamura's personality changed to his "burning mode" persona. Waving his racket around like a fool, Kawamura entered the court.  
  
"Moeru ze! Burning! Come and get some! Welcome! You will taste the awesome power of my beautiful tennis revenge! Delicious, victory!" said Kawamura, pointing his racket at me.  
  
I doubled over on the ground, unable to breathe due to my uncontrollable laughter. Thoroughly dejected, Kawamura lowered his racket and gave me a puzzled look.  
  
"Do you have any idea what you're saying? Or did you just randomly pick words out of an English dictionary?" I said, rolling on the ground in laughter.  
  
"Oh well, let's get this over with shall we," I said, collecting myself.  
  
"Kawamura to serve."  
  
Kawamura tossed the ball high into the air and swung his racket hard.  
  
"Kurae, burning!" yelled Kawamura, hitting the ball with all his might. I managed to catch up and return the ball. Kawamura changed stances, holding his right arm back slightly and crouching.  
  
"Deta, Kawamura senpai's Hadoukyu!" exclaimed the freshmen trio. I was seriously getting annoyed at hearing their prepubescent voices cry out every single attack during a match.  
  
Kawamura hit the ball, blasting it towards me. Much to my surprise, the ball was moving so fast it was literally on fire.  
  
"Umm, if the ball is going fast enough that it would actually catch on fire then there's no frigging way I can return it with a dinky tennis racket," I said, side stepping the ball. The ball raced forward, burning a hole through the chain link fence of the tennis court. The ball continued its destructive course, setting fire to a line of grass. A group of unsuspecting middle school kids hanging out near the side of the school barely had time to react before the ball finally slammed into the brick wall behind them. The ball left a gigantic imprint in the wall sending chunks of brick and cement flying everywhere. The poor middle school kids, unfortunate enough to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, were knocked back onto the pavement by the shockwave the ball created. The tennis ball smoldered.  
  
"Wow, nice Kawamura, way to destroy everything," I said, gazing at the mangled chain link fence, burning grass, and the now demolished wall of the school. Kawamura's expression was completely surprised, as he sighed and held his head down, walking off the tennis court. We waited until the fire was put out and the middle school kids were sent to the nurse to check on their injuries.  
  
"Hmm, well that wasn't as exciting as I had hoped for. Maybe Kaidoh can provide a little more entertainment. How about it Mamushi?" I said, grinning.  
  
"Fsssssssssssssssssssh", said Kaidoh, gripping his racket and lurking onto the court.  
  
Kaidoh stood at the baseline, swaying back and forth in the same weird and practically useless posture of the viper.  
  
"Kaidoh to serve!"  
  
I gripped my racket and prepared for Kaidoh's serve. Hitting the ball, Kaidoh delivered a powerful serve. However since he was only thirteen, returning the ball was a simple matter. Our rally had lasted for a few minutes, without either of us being able to score a point. I returned the ball, hitting it towards the corners.  
  
"Alright Kaidoh! Show him you're awesome Boomerang Snake!" cheered Kikumaru.  
  
Kaidoh swung his racket low, bent his knees forward, and delivered his Boomerang Snake shot! However, instead of the ball curving around the pole and returning towards the opposite court, it simply continued traveling straight and landed in an empty adjacent court.  
  
"Nani?" said Kaidoh, thoroughly confused at the ineffectiveness of his ridiculously impossible Boomerang Snake technique.  
  
"Kaidoh has mastered the timing and the stroke for the Boomerang Snake, what could be the problem?" said Inui, looking through his journal.  
  
"Well for one, Inui, it kind of defies the laws of physics," I said.  
  
"Laws of...physics?" questioned Inui, a look of clear puzzlement on his face.  
  
"Umm...yeah. If you're the brain of this team, then God save the rest of you. You can't hit a ball and then have it magically change direction in mid flight for no reason. Newton's laws of mechanics, duh," I said, tapping my racket against my right shoulder. The match with Kaidoh continued, Kaidoh getting considerably angry that neither his Snake nor Boomerang Snake techniques worked.  
  
"If I could just...if I could just overcome the laws of motion I could master my Boomerang Snake and defeat this gaijin!" said Kaidoh to himself. Unfortunately, Kaidoh had to play within the constraints of natural laws, and found himself unable to cope.  
  
"Game and Match."  
  
Kaidoh, thoroughly dejected at his loss, slinked off the court. Thoroughly pleased with myself, I looked over to the group of remaining Seigaku regulars.  
  
"Well, let's make things more interesting. Inui, how about you?"  
  
Inui grabbed his tennis racket and walked towards the court. Looking through his journal, he finally closed it and set it down.  
  
"I now have all your data inputted into my head," said Inui.  
  
"Uhh...yeah. You're serve bud."  
  
Inui threw the ball into the air and served it. I immediately ran up to the ball and hit it to the opposite corner.  
  
"Probability of a short cross 85%" said Inui, returning the ball. Our rally had continued for awhile, with neither side being able to take the point.  
  
"Probability of a shot to the right, 100%" said Inui to himself.  
  
I immediately raised an eyebrow and hit the ball to the left side of Inui's court, scoring the point. Inui stood there, his mouth open.  
  
"My data, did not predict that..." said Inui to himself, clearly surprised at the logical failure of his data tennis.  
  
"Umm, if you mumble out loud your predictions it's pretty _easy_ just to do the opposite. Please don't tell me know one has thought of that before?"  
  
Inui adjusted his glasses and clutched his racket. I found it pretty easy to beat Inui, just by doing the opposite of what he predicted.  
  
"Game and match."  
  
Inui, dejected, clutched his journal angrily and rejoined the Seigaku regulars. Yawning to myself, I clutched my racket and tapped it against my hip.  
  
"Looks like it's my term, nya," said the now miniature Kikumaru.  
  
"Kikumaru's acrobatic play is unstoppable!" yelled out Horio.  
  
"Kikumaru, to serve"  
  
Kikumaru got into serving position, threw the ball into the air and served while exclaiming "Hoi!"  
  
I returned the ball, and a long rally had ensued. Kikumaru was quite nimble and quick, allowing him to pull of some nice trick shots. I lobbed the ball, since Kikumaru was at his usual place, the net. Running backwards, Kikumaru jumped very high into the air.  
  
"Deta! Kikumaru's acrobatic play!" yelled out Kachiro.  
  
"Kikumaru will hit the ball, then after his opponent returns it, he will use his superior acrobatic skill to hit the ball on his way down before his opponent can react," replied Inui, adjusted his glasses.  
  
Kikumaru hit the ball towards me exclaiming "Hoi!"  
  
I raised an eyebrow and returned the ball. Kikumaru then dived down face first to hit the ball and then flip over to land on his feet, at least, that's what his intention was.  
  
"I'm not even going to bother explaining why that's totally not possible..." I said, rolling my eyes and watching Kikumaru.  
  
Kikumaru landed on his neck before he could right himself to land on his feet.  
  
"HOI!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed out Kikumaru as his neck made a loud crunching noise. Moments later, some of the tennis club members carried Kikumaru away on a stretcher. Inui looked off towards Kikumaru who was being carried away.  
  
"It looks like Kikumaru will never be able to use that technique again...or eat solid foods," said Inui.  
  
"What, no one wants to face me now?" I said. The now pint sized Seigaku regulars all shook their heads in disapproval.  
  
"I'd like to face you," said a mysterious voice.  
  
"Hmm? Who is it?" I asked.  
  
Appearing from behind a tree, Kajimoto and Shinjyoo of Jyosei Shyonan appeared. Kajimoto and Shinjyoo walked into the tennis court, thoroughly confused at the site of the now chibi Seigaku regulars.  
  
"What happened here...I feel funny... I" said Kajimoto, holding his head as he and Shinjyoo rapidly shrunk in size.  
  
"This strange gaijin defeats all of our best attacks using a strange technique he calls 'physics'," said Inui.  
  
"We were passing by and caught sight of the match with Inui. I've wanted to face someone exceptionally strong," said Kajimoto in a markedly higher voice. Grasping his tennis racket, Kajimoto walked to the opposite court.  
  
"Hmm, okay, let's do this Kajimoto-kun" I said, grasping my tennis racket.  
  
"Jyosei Shyonan Kajimoto, to serve!"  
  
Kajimoto bounced the ball a few times and prepared to deliver his specialty, the fantastic L drill serve. Using his flexibility, the L Drill serve is a powerful serve where Kajimoto bends backwards, with the back of his head almost touching the ground, and then rushes upwards to hit the ball. Throwing the ball up in the air, Kajimoto bent backwards to use his L-Drill serve! I grasped my racket in anticipation.  
  
"OH GOD THE PAIN! MY BACK IS IN SUCH PAIN! SOMEONE HELP, I CAN'T MOVE, MY BACK IS BROKEN! THE PAIN IS TOO MUCH TO BEAR!" screamed Kajimoto, now on the ground bent into a human donut. Several of the Seigaku non-regular members got a stretcher and carried the now disfigured Kajimoto to the school nurse.  
  
"Wow wasn't that anticlimactic," I remarked, thoroughly embarrassed for poor Kajimoto.  
  
Shinjyoo, thoroughly disturbed by the paralysis of his team captain, took to the court to face me. Shinjyoo, as always, had a very blank and expressionless look to his face. His hair was cut short and dyed gray. Instead of a clear hair line, triangles of hair were shaved off in the front. I simply stared at Shinjyoo, and then chuckled to myself.  
  
"Dude, is your barber blind or just pissed off at you? Your hair cut looks ridiculous!" I said, laughing my head off pointing at Shinjyoo. Shinjyoo's eyes widened, he was clearly angered by my mockery. Shinjyoo crossed his arms, and prepared to deliver his powerful "Deep Inpulse" attack. The Seigaku regulars watched in awe.  
  
"Shinjyoo is going to use it, the Deep Impulse. That gaijin is in for it now! That shot is amazingly powerful!" exclaimed Horio.  
  
Shinjyoo grunted, gathering power for the Deep Inpulse. Throwing the ball into the air, Shinjyoo hit the ball with all his might, exclaiming "Deep Impulse!"  
  
I nonchalantly hit the ball back into Shinjyoo's court, easily scoring the point. Shinjyoo's eyes grew as wide as saucers, amazed at the ease in which his Deep Impulse was returned.  
  
"Honestly, what advantage do you think you gain by crossing your arms and grunting before you hit the ball? What a moron..." I said. The game was finished up pretty quickly, as without the Deep Impulse Shinjyoo didn't have too much else. I was thoroughly dissatisfied with all my previous matches.  
  
"Well, I guess there is only one more person left. The star of the show. Show me what you've got, Echizen," I said, pointing my racket at Echizen.  
  
Echizen grinned, clearly excited by the previous matches. Walking over to the court, Echizen got into serving position.  
  
"Hayaku Sakuno, I hear there is somebody beating all of the senpai's at the tennis club. We have to make sure Ryoma-sama is alright!" said Tomo, dragging Sakuno Ryuzaki behind her. The girls were wearing matching skimpy yellow cheerleading outfits and were carrying sparkling pink pon pons.  
  
"I'm sure Ryoma is fine", said Sakuno.  
  
The two girls reached the tennis club, and were clearly surprised at the change in their senpai's.  
  
"What...happened here? All of the senpai's...are at least a foot shorter..." said Tomo in amazement.  
  
"It's all due to him," said Fuji, pointing to me.  
  
"Look, Tomo, Ryoma is playing that gaijin over there!" said Sakuno, pointing towards the court.  
  
"Ike Ryoma-sama! Hurray Ryoma-sama! Fight-o!" yelled Tomo, waving her pom poms and cheering.  
  
Clearly annoyed, a looked over at the two girls and glared.  
  
"Don't you two girls have lives outside of making ridiculous fools of yourselves in public, cheering for a boy that doesn't care if you exist? By the way, do your parents know you're dressed like two dollar whores?" I asked in an annoyed tone of voice.  
  
Tomo stopped cheering, her pom poms dangling at her side. Sakuno's eyes welled up with tears.  
  
"Don't you two study or something? Wait...nevermind, of course you don't study. There wouldn't be any point," I said, waving the two girls off. I nodded for Ryoma to begin the match.  
  
Ryoma was serving with his right hand, tossing the ball high into the air and hitting it using his twist serve technique.  
  
"Deta, Twist Serve!" exclaimed the freshman trio of Horio, Kachiro, and Katsuno.  
  
The ball flew into my court, revolved rapidly and sprang up towards my face. I immediately dodged the ball.  
  
"15-0".  
  
"Yosha! Echizen got a service ace, Ike, Echizen!" yelled Horio.  
  
I grinned, waiting for Echizen to serve the ball. Echizen delivered another twist serve, but I was able to return it to his court. Unlike the other matches, Echizen proved to be a much stronger opponent. A long rally ensued, with neither of us backing down.  
  
"Game, Echizen, 2 games all."  
  
Echizen had scored a point by hitting the ball to the back of the court.  
  
"Well Echizen I have to hand it to you, you're way more realistic than the rest of your team," I said, grinning slightly.  
  
"Doomo," said Echizen, pulling his cap downwards.  
  
"Sasuga Ryoma-sama!" said Tomo, leaping in the air and waving her pon pons like a monkey. Sakuno, who was still in tears from my earlier comments, simply stood next to Tomo without making a sound.  
  
I served the ball to Echizen, who was able to return it again. I decided to hit the ball into the center court. Much to my surprise, Echizen began to skid along the ground of the court, sparks flying every which direction.  
  
"Deta, Drive B!" exclaimed the freshman trio.  
  
I simply stared in disbelief at Echizen.  
  
"Umm...if you were skidding along the court fast enough so that sparks flew from your shoes, wouldn't the heat melt the rubber soles of your shoes?"  
  
Echizen's expression turned to surprise, as he noticed that the rubber soles of his shoes had melted, burning the soles of his feet. One of the sparks had caught itself onto his shorts, setting them on fire. Echizen rolled around on the ground trying to put out his shorts, howling in pain as his soles were covered in molten rubber. Inui and Fuji rushed over to Echizen, stamping out the fire as Echizen rolled around. Later, two of the non regular members came with a stretcher to take Echizen to see the school nurse.  
  
The sky had become dark, and lightning began to spark and explode across the sky. Gazing upwards, I was lifted off my feet by a strong wind. The Seigaku regulars, Tomo, Sakuno, and the freshman trio of Horio, Kachiro, and Katsuno, watched in awe as I was carried away into the storm.  
  
I was thrown into the vortex of clouds and sent through a tunnel of energy. Moments later, I flew out of my computer monitory back into my chair. The thunderstorm had ceased, and my computer seemed to be back to normal. I tried to collect myself, totally shaken by recent events.  
  
"Man what a ride." 


	2. Bonus Tezuka Chapter!

(Here it is! The long awaited bonus Tezuka chapter)

It had been a week or so since my adventures in the world of Seigaku, and needless to say I was glad to return back to the world of non-Technicolor. Life had returned to normal, more or less, and I was back into the groove of school life and having fun. Having beaten some of the best players on the Kantou tournament circuit, I decided I needed to hone my tennis skills. Near my house there is a brand spanking new tennis court constructed by the school. Since none of my tennis buddies were around I decided to practice alone against a wall. I had started to hit the ball back and forth, practicing my forehand and backhand. It was a very sunny day and the sky had been clear and blue all day. Suddenly, dark, gloomy clouds began to collect above, darkening the sky.

"Strange, it was just perfect weather a second ago," I thought as I looked up towards the sky.

I immediately heard footsteps behind me. There had been no one else on the tennis court, so I thought maybe someone had come with whom I could have a match. Turning around, I was thoroughly surprised by a few prince of tennis characters. There was Kikumaru, who wheeled along in a motorized wheelchair. There was Kajimoto who was wearing a back brace. Immediately behind them were Echizen, Tezuka Kunimitsu, and Sanada Genichirou. I noticed Echizen was wearing long pants as opposed to shorts (probably to hide the burn marks), and that his shoes were brand new.

"I hope his burns are healed by now," I thought to myself slightly snickering.

"I take it you are the 'gaijin' everyone's been talking about?" asked the very deep voiced Tezuka Kunimitsu. Tezuka had his usual cold expression and was wearing the classic blue and white Seigaku tennis uniform.

"How…did…you…how…can…you BE here?" I asked puzzled, but then answered my own question when I remembered how I came to their world.

"When I returned from Germany I found Seigaku in total disarray. Everyone had grown shorter, and their tennis has never been the same. I was told you were the cause of all this. I have come to challenge you, do you accept?" said Tezuka in his stately tone of voice.

It was extremely strange and unnerving at the same time to see a tall, Technicolor man standing in front of me challenging me to a game of tennis, but weirder things have happened.

"Sure, let's play."

"Wait," said the cool and expressionless Sanada. "I must play the gaijin myself to truly test his mettle. Rumor of your skills has reached us at Rikkadai Fuzoku, and as the #1 player in middle school tennis I cannot allow you to remain undefeated," said Sanada, removing his jersey.

I simply shrugged.

"Cold as ice as usual. Fine then Sanada, let's play."

Both of us got into position and prepared to play. I served the ball into Sanada's court, and a furious battle of tennis ensued. I was pleased to see that for the most part, Sanada's moves were in the realm of the possible. I immediately took the first game by sending the ball careening into the opposite court.

"Game, me, Sanny-boy" I said smirking sarcastically.

Apparently perturbed by my non-chalant nature, Sanada got into serving position and took on a very serious face.

"If he wants to play it that way, I'll have to answer him with my own strength," thought Sanada as he served the ball.

"Wonder what he was in store.." I thought as I expertly returned the ball.

Getting into position, Sanada let out a war cry as he swung the tennis racket so fast his arm seemed to be a moving blur.

"Deta, Invisible swing," remarked Echizen who was watching the match with intensity in his eyes.

However, much to Sanada's surprise, within seconds he had no arm where there had previously been one. Screaming out in pain, the tennis titan fell to his knees thoroughly shocked. Tezuka and Echizen were thoroughly surprised and turned to me. I immediately pulled out a gigantic chalkboard (funny how when cartoon characters are around such things are always conveniently at hand) and began to explain.

"For Sanada to swing his racket so fast you cannot see either his arm or the ball, it must be moving faster than the speed of light. However, this isn't possible in the slightest. When Sanada's arm accelerated to that speed, his arm (since it's matter) converted into pure energy, and therefore he no longer has an arm, as you can see," pointing a baton at Sanada who had now passed out from the pain.

"I've seen enough. We will no longer be plagued by your laws of physics. Once I defeat you here we will all return back to normal. Face me," said Tezuka in a rather stately manner, taking position on the court while Sanada was being put on stretcher.

We both go into our positions and got ready to have our match. I was excited in a way, to finally play the captain of the Seigaku team and possibly the strongest tennis player of them all. Besides being the most skilled, Tezuka was also the most ridiculous player of them all with his patented "Tezuka Zone" and "Zero-Shiki Drop Shot". "Thankfully," I thought, "this is the real world where that magical stuff can't happen."

"We'll let Echizen be the ref. How about it?" I yelled out to Tezuka.

"That is fine by me," he replied.

Tezuka procured a ball from his pocket and prepared to serve. The ball zoomed into my court at a very impressive speed, and I quickly got into position to return the ball. A fierce rally ensued. Tezuka definitely lived up to the hype as he was very quick, nimble, and precise in his aim.

"Game, Tezuka," announced Echizen.

"Looks like the first game is yours Tez," I said after losing the first match after being broken at 30. We switched courts and got back into position. I served the ball and a rally began. It was finally 30-40, and I really wanted to tie it so that I could win the game. Tezuka stepped back and hit the ball. However this time something was quite different.

"…This sure is … strange…"

A golden aura began to form around Tezuka, denoting his use of the "Tezuka Zone". Every ball I hit, at no matter what angle returned to Tezuka as if by magic. Not believing what I was seeing, I immediately decided to hit the ball straight up in the air. Much to my astonishment the ball simply curved down at a strange angle right towards Tezuka, who immediately took the point.

"Tezuka Zone," muttered Echizen who was watching the match intently.

Needless to say I was dumbfounded. It was maddening, every ball I hit, at every imaginable angle you could hit it, everything returned neatly in front of Tezuka.

"Well so much for relying on physics in the real world," I thought as I continued to play, thoroughly frustrated.

The rally continued, until Tezuka made a mistake and sent the tennis ball careening out of the court. Not wanting to try and find the ball in the brush near the courts, I simply went to my bag to get one of my own.

"Wait…we can still use one of my balls…" said Tezuka, looking rather frightened.

"What do you mean? Who cares what balls we use?" I asked puzzled. At that moment, it hit me. I immediately dropped my bag and went to the brush in order to look for the lost ball. Tezuka, apparently frightened, dropped his racket and ran over to me. Before he reached me, I found the ball, got a small knife out of my bag, and cut into the ball. Just as I thought.

"Tezuka…you…you…CHEATER!"

Inside the tennis ball was a lightweight piece of magnet.

"Now I know what the 'Tezuka Zone' is. You're such a fake, you used magnets and a metal racket with coated strings. Of course the ball returns to you its all magnetism!"

Tezuka sighed, and hung his head low in shame. All the other Prince of Tennis characters simply gasped in shock. Tezuka and I resumed our game with a normal tennis ball, and as I expected, I owned him like no other. Not even looking at his friends, the Seigaku captain left the court thoroughly defeated, with all the other characters limping behind after him.

The End.

(Stupid Tezuka Zone….)


End file.
